Re-reading day 001 , applying , breathing ….
from day 001 : Q1.If I forgive myself, for feeling guilty , or afraid …how does this help me improve my life and others around me ? Q2.What is the intention/ goal in this writing ?Q3. Will this help me be more focused ? Q4.Will this help me in making more mature decisions , and with more proper intentions ?
Several days later , again sitting here. breathing . Ok , write ….
Q&A1. If i forgive myself , for feeling guilty , or afraid ….how does this help me improve my life and others around me ?
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not actually accept or allow myself to realize the impact of feeling guilty , or afraid… physically/mentally , to myself/others.
I am awake now to the fact that I have buried myself inside under a blanket of fear and guilt , and banned/ put up a wall , in my mind , tying myself to silence and tryed dissasociate myself from reality/ the world / family / …..myself ..healing , truth , peace inside.
I created the lock on my mind , and keept myself from breathing .
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize Guilt, Fear and Depression.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to needlessly surrounded myself/others with the self made emotions and state of mind of Guilt , Fear and Depression.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to accept and allow myself to manifest self loathing behavior that I did not accept and allow myself to understand , was infact my own manifestation inwardly/outwardly to myself/others.
I alone am the reason for my own emotions. I understand that physical circumstances can and often do trigger our emotions to be disrupt from our own ”normal” state of mind.
I alone am the reason that I project my own emotions. Regardless of my own reasons/excuses for projection .
If I tell myself I can’t do something , then I have outwardly projected failure to myself. If I say I can’t do something , and I can not justify this with an actual physical reason as to why ‘I can’t ‘, then I have told myself a ”little white lie”. I have created a space in my own mind to create a foundation for a cage. More so , I have created the perfect foundation for weakness within myself, to allow myself to accept insult/ and ridicule myself and open the doors to anxiety , grief , fear, shame etc. ..
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not understand that I am hurting myself and others , not only emotionally but also in some ways physically and for not accepting and allowing myself to believe …in me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not to face my self in the past, and will resolve to finishing what I have stated here , (even if I get off task ).
I will work on this ever day , even if I dont write every day , it is important to re read and to read others posts, and to put forth more MORE effort in to this .
(for day 003) first we admit … then we forgive … but let us not dare forget , the importance of self -correction . .. and to learn every day .
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